During infertility most of our relationships suffer in some way. Be it with your spouse, your mother, your sister, or your coworkers, how the experience of infertility is impacting you will influence how you show up to each of those people. But no matter how you appear to them, it is the person that you see reflecting back at you in the mirror whose relationship you need to focus on most of all.
Relationships make up the fabric of our life experience. The people who you surround yourself with are what your life and life stories are based on. How much of your life is based on the people you have in it? Probably a lot.
But what are relationships anyway? You can’t physically hold it in your hand or give it away. Simply put, a relationship consists of all of your thoughts about another person. That’s it. All of those sentences in your mind about another person make up the basis of your relationship with them. It is entirely up to what you think about them, nothing else.
So knowing that our relationships are based on what we think, it should be easy to have great relationships with everyone, right? Not so much. Despite the dozens of relationships you surround yourself with every day, the way in which you think about yourself is the most significant relationship you will have in your life, even beyond infertility.
So what do you think of yourself every day? Do you think of yourself as being strong and capable? Do you compliment yourself and point out your best features? Do you hold yourself in high regard? Do you give yourself grace when you are struggling with something?
The experience of infertility has a way of making you confront your relationship with yourself. How you think about yourself will matter significantly in this process.
If nothing else, commit to loving yourself. This is a big one. Commit to loving every part of yourself that you can, no matter what the circumstances might be. Remember, circumstances are always neutral until you think about them. The beauty is you always get to choose what you want to think about everything that is happening. You can always choose who you want to be.
Need help getting your relationship with yourself in order? Book a free strategy session with me and begin building the relationship you need with yourself to move beyond infertility and onto motherhood.