“It’s your fault I feel _______!”
Have you ever said that before? No doubt we’ve all be caught in the blame game at some point in life and especially when we feel something negative. When we blame other people we essentially end up assigning responsibility to them for our emotions. In the process we give someone else the power to decide how we feel and we were so disappointed when it isn’t in line with making us feel good.
Blame is what happens when we delegate our emotional life to another person. We let them take responsibility for us meanwhile absolving ourselves from having any control over what happens. That feels terrible and so disempowering.
The truth is people are awful at making us feel good. Truly. They just don’t know how to do it. We expect them to make us feel good things like love, joy, and security and then get upset when they make us feel angry, annoyed, or disappointed.
When we think other people are responsible for how we feel we give up all power and control in our lives to them. We sit and wait to see what they will say or do because we think that will dictate how we feel. Our emotions seem out of our control because when we are operating from that place it means we have to depend on them to change how we feel. Who knows when they will make us feel good again?
The good news is that you don’t have to wait for anyone else to determine how you feel because you are the only one responsible for your emotions. Every moment of every day you hold that power.
This is because all of your feelings come from your thinking. You can generate any feeling you want because you generate every thought you have. Want to feel love? Then generate thoughts that evoke that emotion. The same is true for any negative emotion you are having. Trace it back to your thoughts and you will see the source.
Taking responsibility for your own feelings is empowering and important. The best way to go through life is to own your own happiness and let other people take responsibility for theirs. You’ll be amazed at what opens up for you when you stop blaming other people and have control over your emotional life.
Ready to take back your power in your life? Schedule a strategy session with me to get started.