In the depths of my infertility experience, I thought everyone knew what I was going through. I thought they obviously could see I was having trouble conceiving. I thought that it wore the signs of it like a scarlet letter. They must know.

The truth was, most people were clueless. And even with the few friends we did confide in initially, some of them ignored that realm of our life completely as if they never heard anything about it.

Most people have no idea what it is you are experiencing. In fact, with 10% of women having difficulty getting pregnant or staying pregnant, that means the other 90% of women out there are left to wonder what exactly is it like to walk in your shoes. They don’t know what it is like to have your heart ache so much because you want to get pregnant and have a baby or why you cry on the first day of your period. For the longest time I thought everyone should just understand how difficult this was for me. The truth was, they had no idea.

That was something I had to wrap my mind around and, to be honest, it took me a while to do so. All of the judgment I was projecting on to them was really my own judgment about my own experience. I was my worst and harshest critic. And even if I thought everyone was judging me so harshly, I realized there was nothing I could do about it.

I had to let go of caring what other people thought about me when it came to our fertility struggle. The only people whose opinions I cared anything about were my own and my husbands. What other people think about it is none of my business. What they say about it is none of my business. Letting go of caring about the scrutiny from others has made this process so much easier. I feel so much more free not investing mental energy into worrying about what other people think about my infertility.

Want to let go of caring what other people think about your infertility experience? I can help you.